Joy the Baker

It’s Friday.  I know you weren’t expecting this, but it’s time for a Pop Quiz.  

Don’t worry.  If you’ve done the reading this should be easy… (I hated when teachers would say that to me). 

Pop Quiz

1) True or False:  The joining of chocolate and coffee is like a cosmic combination of all that is good, just, and rock and roll in the universe. 

2) Fill in the Blank:  Breakfast is the most _________________ . 

3)  Multiple Choice:  The best choice for this weekend’s breakfast treat is:

a) stale Cheerios.  

b) Gerard Butler and hot fudge sauce. 

c) breakfast sandwiches made on Cheddar Black Pepper Biscuits.  

Now… here are the answers: 

1)  True….. duh!  2) Breakfast is the most important meal that ever was.  3) c… if and only if b is unavailable.  

Perfect score?  We’re best friends.  Take note. 

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On losing, letting go of little sisters, and warm biscuits:

We never talked about this.  I didn’t know how to bring it up.  The 2009 Bloggies.  Remember?  Best New Blog?  So… I sorta…. kinda…. mostly… didn’t win.  The thing is, I really really wanted to win.  I did.  I played it cool though.  On the outside, I pretended to not care either way.  That was a big fat lie.  But the thing about losing… it’s pretty cool actually… it makes me want to be better.  It also makes me unbelievably grateful for all of your smiling faces.  Fact.

I found myself in a frenzy this morning.  My little sister left for a many month long European adventure.  The thought of her being so far away that I can’t easily call her at two in the morning to scream our favorite Mariah Carey song at her sent me into panic mode.  I calmed myself, safe in the knowledge that my sister deserved some life changing adventures and I am due many presents from far away lands upon her return.

Biscuits.  If I were to hand you a warm biscuit with raspberry jam would you: a)  throw it on the ground and shove me on the floor or b) thank me kindly, gobble the biscuit and give me a giant hug?  If your answer involved shoving me on the floor… well, that’s kinda funny, but throwning biscuits on the floor is just plain rude.  Don’t do it.

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Here are a few Monday confessions I feel compelled to get off my chest:

I’ve given up working out for the new year.  I don’t wanna do.  I’m liable to throw a tantrum about it.

I just bought a vacuum, and I’m too embarrassed to tell you how long I went without one.

I’m secretly seriously competitive. Did you hear? Did you vote?

I don’t use parchment paper when I’m supposed to.  At all. I don’t have any good reason for not using it, just a serious mental block.

I don’t like to buy myself fancy kitchen equipment.  I’d rather buy shoes.  Crazy, right?

I made these Giant Paprika Cheddar Biscuits last week around ten in the morning.  By two in the afternoon I had worked my way through a cool four of them.

Again… I’ve given up working out for the new year, which I obviously must feel bad about because here I am mentioning it again.  Unfortunately I don’t feel bad enough to lace up my running shoes…   sigh… moving on!

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These Pecan Sour Cream Biscuits take me back home.  I come from a biscuit loving family.  We take our biscuits rather seriously.  My Dad makes what he calls Mile High Biscuits.  They’re light and buttery, a beautiful golden color, and we always ate them hot with dinner.  We were generally a happy family of 4 sitting around the dinner table, sharing a meal, laughing, and talking about our days.  Biscuit night was always a different story. On biscuit nights, there was, without a doubt, scandal and conflict.

Why?  Well Dad always made a recipe of 12 biscuits.  Now let’s do the math- 12 biscuits for 4 people, that’s 3 each.  The problem is, no one never ended up with three biscuits.  Three words- my little sister.  My sister, the biscuit strategist, would cunningly place the biscuit basket at her side of the table, and with great stealth, gather about 8 biscuits for herself over the course of dinner.  I must admit, the girl is clever.  And with her darling smile and endless charm, she always got away with the lion’s share of biscuits. Always!  I’d stomp my feet, outraged, pleading “But Mom…!  It’s not fair!”  Mom would calmly reply “Joy, who said life was fair?  Now eat your broccoli before it gets cold.”At that point, defeated, I usually just ate my one biscuit slowly, while trying to shoot my sister down with the evil eye.  Mom was right though- life isn’t always fair, sometimes your sister just gets more biscuits than you, and steamed broccoli once it’s cold, is just wretched.

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