So….. what do you do when you forget to call your grandmother on her 80th birthday?  

Well… obviously you yell at your little sister who remembered to call your grandmother on her 80th birthday, and didn’t remind you to call your grandmother on her 80th birthday.  Some nerve.

See… forgetting to call your grandmother on her 80th birthday is just about as bad as kicking your dear and darling 80 year old grandmother in the shin.  It’s not cool.  There’s no going back.  You’re a real jerk if you don’t call your grandmother on her 80th birthday.  

Ok.  Here’s the deal universe.  I hope I live to be 80.  Please.  That would be great.  I think…. I hope. 

On May 25, 2061 Universe, I want you to break my phone.  See to it that no one calls to wish me a happy birthday.  I’ll remember why.  I’ll remember that I deserve it.  For real.  Yeeesh!

Also… biscotti.  I made some delicious biscotti.  This is me, sharing.  

Cinnamon toast was the first thing I taught myself to make in the kitchen.  White bread.  Inconceivable amounts of softened and salted butter, too much sugar and lots and lots of cinnamon.  Starch?  Sugar and spice!?  It’s perfect.  God bless it.

Cinnamon Sugar Biscotti are the crisp version of cinnamon sugar toast.  Crunchy, loads of sweet cinnamon flavor.  Perfect with a cup of coffee or tea.  And!  These are nut free biscotti!  That’s exciting for me… I don’t really like giant almonds in my cookie.  So… success!

Cinnamon Sugar Biscotti

     recipe found on epicurious.com

     makes about 24 cookies

     Print this Recipe!

2 cups flour

1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

1 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 cup granulated sugar

6 Tablespoons (3/4 stick) unsalted butter, at room temperature

1 egg

1 egg yolk

1 teaspoon vanilla

For Topping:

1/4 cup granulated sugar

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 beaten egg (for brushing biscotti before baking) 

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F and arrange two baking racks in the upper portion of the oven.  Line two baking sheets with parchment paper and set aside.  

In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, cinnamon, baking powder and salt.  Set aside.  

Also whisk together the cinnamon and sugar for the topping and set aside.  

In the bowl of a stand mixer, fit with a paddle attachment, cream the butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 4 minutes.  Scrape down the down and beat in the egg followed by the egg yolk.  Beat in the vanilla extract.  

Add the dry ingredients to the creamed butter all at once.  With the mixer or just with a spatula, bring all of the ingredients together until a somewhat stiff dough is formed.  

Divide the dough in two on the two making sheets.  Shape each half of dough into a 9-inch long and 1 1/2-inch wide log.  Brush with the beaten egg and sprinkle very generously with cinnamon sugar.  Bake the two sheets on two different racks in the oven for 20 minutes.  Rotate the cookie sheets for even baking and bake for 20-25 more minutes until golden and firm to the touch. 

Remove from the oven but keep the oven on.  Let biscotti cool until able to handle.  Using a serrated knife, cut logs into 1/2-inch wide diagonal slices.  Place biscotti cut side down on baking sheet and sprinkle with more cinnamon sugar.  Bake again until pale golden, about 10-15 minutes.  

Store in an airtight container for up to one week.

Dear Future Husband and Future Children,

While it’s clear that the universe hasn’t yet pressed us together into a family mold, I think it prudent to get a few things about our life out in the open.  You know, for the sake of transparency.

Future Husband!  In all likelihood, I think you’re the coolest guy around.  You’re awesome.  While I’m certain there are things you do that drive me a little mad, the fact that you help me with the dishes and make me tea in the morning just makes me swoon.  I’m a little quirky.  You’re probably a little nutty too.  That’s only  fair.  You should know that I sometimes show my love in… pancakes, piles and piles of warm pancakes.  Pancakes for breakfast.  Pancakes for a snack.  Pancakes for dinner.  Pancakes.  It’s important that you like, no, loooove pancakes and understand that when I make giant plates of them for breakfast, I’m just trying to show you how much I love you.  Deal?

Future Children!  You’re super cute.  You must be just adorable.  You should know that I want to squeeze you constantly.  When I mix up your names, you should know that it’s not that I don’t know your names… it’s just that things get a little complicated when I’m trying to wrangle all y’all.  Eat your broccoli.  It will make you beautiful, or at least that’s what my Mom used to tell me.  When you feel mortified by my very presence in your teenage years, just realize that that’s all part of the game.  I’m actually not that uncool and you’ll realize that at some point.

Also, like I told your father, I’m going to make you piles and piles of pancakes some mornings.  Eat them, because I love you and you love me, and we love pancakes.

Thanks Future Husband.  Thanks Future Children.  I love you like crazy.  K.  Thanks.  Bye.

Future Wife/Future Mother,

Joy

We know what crazy deliciousness happens when fluffy pancakes meets carrot cake.  What could go wrong when fluffy pancakes meet oatmeal raisin cookies?  Nothing, just sheer delicious, breakfast times.  These pancakes are not overwhelmingly sweet, but have just the right balance of fluff, oats, cinnamon and raisins.  With pure maple syrup, these are out of this world!  Show some love.  Make someone pancakes!

Oatmeal Cookie Pancakes

Print this recipe!

makes loads of pancakes, enough for four people

2 eggs

1 1/2 cups flour

heaping 1/2 cup old fashioned oats

2 tablespoons brown sugar

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon

healthy pinch of freshly ground nutmeg

2 cups buttermilk

1 tablespoon pure maple syrup

4 tablespoons butter, melted and cooled

½ teaspoons vanilla extract

1/2 cup golden raisins

oil or cooking spray (for cooking)

Step 1: In a large bowl beat eggs. Add buttermilk, butter , maple syrup and vanilla and mix well. Add flour, oats, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, spices and salt. Mix well until mostly smooth. Fold in raisins and let batter set for a few minutes.
Step 2: Heat griddle or pan over medium heat. Add a teaspoon of oil to the pan or spray with cooking spray. You can test to see if the pan is hot enough by adding a few drops of water,  when the drops start to dance its hot enough.
Step 3: Pour 2 Tablespoons of batter onto the griddle. Cook on the first side until bubbles that form start to pop. You can also gently lift up the pancake to make sure the bottom is not overcooking, if it is the pan may be too hot and you will need to adjust the heat. Flip the pancake over with a spatula and cook until golden brown. Repeat until all the batter is gone. Let cooked pancakes rest on a heat proof plate in a 200 degree F oven until ready to serve.

I woke up this morning ready to celebrate Friday.  This, despite the fact that I’m convinced that I’m due at least fourteen hours more sleep, and moving past the idea that I deserve a sleep re-do for having fallen asleep with all the light on, teeth unbrushed and (gasp!) bra still on.  I don’t get a do-over, or more sleep… but I do get a Friday, and that’s a little bit of all right with me.

This week, I overheard someone say “Whatever… you know that Thursday is the new Friday.”  Hm… I don’t know where they work, or how they pull that off, but to me “Friday is the same, old Friday”… and sometimes “Saturday is the new Friday” making “Sunday the new weekend”.

Wanting to celebrate Friday as the same, old Friday got me thinking about all the great little moments I had during the week.  You know… the little things- getting a card in the mail from Mom, or finding a crumpled ten dollar bill in your back pocket.

What are the three best things that happened to you this week?   Think on it.  Here’s what I’m workin’ with.

1. I dropped a cake I had just baked on the floor.  We can talk more about that later,  but thought to myself:  ok, well that shouldn’t happen again for another few months.  I’m glad that’s out of the way.  Then I wanted to yell and swear, but there was no one around to hear it, so I didn’t bother.  This restraint for lack of an audience later made me laugh at myself.

2.  I’m sitting here, in this very moment, enjoying a cup of hot tea and a few of my dad’s buttermilk biscuits.  It’s quiet and sunny and just warm enough to not regret my warm covers in the other room.  Quiet simplicity is a week highlight for sure.

3.  I’m going up to Oakland this weekend.  I’m going to wear a dress.  Don’t try to stop me.  Both things are going to happen.

In the meantime, I think you should take these Cinnamon Raisin Pull-Apart Muffins for a spin.

These Pull Apart Muffins might be a problem.  See, they’re as fun to eat as they are delicious.  They’re basically, a pizza crust recipe, patted down, doused with flour, cinnamon and sugar, then tossed with a buttery brown sugar mixture, cut into chunks and packed lightly into a greased muffin tin.  They bake up into loose muffins made up of doughy, spiced chunks of yummy breakfast goodness.

Cinnamon Raisin Pull Apart Muffins

Print this recipe!

makes about a dozen muffins.

3 cups flour (can replace up to half of this with whole wheat flour)
2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 teaspoon active dry yeast
1 cup lukewarm water (may need up to 1 or 2 tablespoons more)
2  tablespoon olive oil

1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened

1 1/4 cup brown sugar

1/2 cup granulated sugar

3 Tablespoons flour

1/2 teaspoon cornstarch

1 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

handful of golden raisins (optional)

more flour, granulated sugar and cinnamon for dusting

Stir dry ingredients, including yeast, in a large bowl. Add water and olive oil, stirring mixture into as close to a ball as you can. Dump all clumps and floury bits onto a lightly floured surface and knead everything into a homogeneous ball.

If you are finding this step difficult, one of the best tricks I picked up from my bread-making class is to simply pause. Leave the dough in a lightly-floured spot, put the empty bowl upside-down on top of it and come back in 2 to 5 minutes, at which point you will find the dough a lot more lovable.  The dough should looks like this after the first knead.

Knead it for just a minute or two. Lightly oil the bowl (a spritz of cooking spray perfectly does the trick) where you had mixed it —

one-bowl recipe!-dump the dough in, turn it over so all sides are coated, cover it in plastic wrap and leave it undisturbed for an hour or two, until it has doubled in size.  I placed my bowl of wrapped dough in the fridge overnight instead of leaving it out for two hours.

Dump it back on the floured counter (yup, I leave mine messy), and gently press the air out of the dough with the palm of your hands. Fold the piece into an approximate ball shape, and let it sit under that plastic wrap for 20 more minutes.  If you’ve left your dough in the fridge overnight like I did, preheat your oven to 350 degrees F, place the covered bowl of dough near the oven, or on a stovetop burner that doesn’t get too hot, bringing the dough to room temperature faster.  After it’s been out of the fridge for about 30 minutes, dump it onto a floured counter, press the air out and knead the dough into a smooth, happy ball.  Return to the down to warm up a bit more, and rise just a bit more, about 30 minutes more.  Your dough should be doubled in size from the previous night.  The dough should look like this after the second knead.  Smooth!

Grease a muffin pan with vegetable shortening and dust it with flour.  Set aside.  On a well floured work surface, dump out the dough.  Press out with your hands until your dough is about 3/4-inch thick.  The shape doesn’t matter so much.  Begin to cut the dough into small chunks.  Mine were just smaller that one inch chunks.  If the dough sticks to your knife, just flour you knife a bit.  Once cut into chunks, sprinkle the pieces with a bit of flour, a handful of granulated sugar and a generous dusting of ground cinnamon.  Toss on the counter top.

In a separate bowl, combine brown sugar, granulated sugar, butter, flour, cornstarch, raisins and cinnamon until well combined.  I brought my mixture together with my hands.

Fill the muffin tin to the halfway point with dough chunks, softly packing them in.  Top with about a tablespoon of the sugar mixture, then top with more dough chunks, packing lightly.  Finish with more sugar mixture.  That’s four layers for each muffin.

Bake at 350 degrees F for about 12-15 minutes, keeping an eye on them after 12 minutes.  Let cool in the pan for 15 minutes.  Run a sharp knife around the edges of each muffin then gently scoop out of the muffin tin.  Enjoy!

I don’t do dishes in the morning.  Dishes are no way to start the day.

While I am all about a big, fat, kitchen wrecking breakfast- morning clean up is absolutely nowhere in my early day itinerary.

The reality is, I may not get to have that perfect, sunny morning weekend wake up experience everday.  I am convinced, however, that there’s a way to put a smile on my face every morning… even if you have to force it on with a wrench.

When I’m in no mood to get out of bed and start my day I give myself this little speech in my head:  Joy,  stop being such a crabby pants.  Get out of bed, go put on that big robe that feels like a combination of cloud and kitten and make yourself breakfast without setting those robe sleeves on fire.  While you’re treating yourself to a fine morning… go ahead and take a break from those breakfast dishes.  You’ve done enough work just getting out of bed… The dishes can wait.

And just like that, the ugly Monday morning isn’t as nasty a beast as I thought.

Make Monday morning Vanilla Brown Sugar Breakfast Polenta, and let the dirty pan soak in the sink until you get home from work.  Live a little… don’t do the dishes.

What’s the deal with polenta?

Here’s what you need to know:  polenta is ground white or yellow cornmeal.  It is boiled with water or milk and made into a warm and super pleasing porridge.  The mixtures cooks up smooth and creamy and can be made either sweet or savory according to your needs.

The Moretti polenta I used is straight from Italy, although you can find it here it the states.  It’s dreamy.  The Moretti family has been making polenta in Lombardy since 1922.  Their corn is air dried then stone crushed.  It’s the real deal.  The polenta meal comes in different levels of coarseness.  I chose the fine grain meal because it cooks up faster and I love the texture for breakfast food.

Note:  If you have leftover polenta, don’t dump it!  Line a loaf pan with plastic wrap, add the leftover cooked polenta and cover with the overhanging plastic wrap.  Throw it in the fridge for a night or two, and I’ll show you how to make fried polenta sticks next!

Vanilla Brown Sugar Breakfast Polenta

Print this recipe!

1 cup polenta

3 cups cold water

2 cups whole milk

3/4 teaspoon salt

1/3 cup brown sugar

1/2 vanilla bean or 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

sprinkle of cinnamon (if desired)

In a small bowl measure out 1 cup of dried polenta.  Top with 1 cup cold water and stir.  Set aside.  In a medium saucepan add 2 cups cold water and 2 cups whole milk.  Bring to a low boil.  Add salt and stir.  Slowly add the polenta and water mixture, using a whisk to stir out any possible lumps.

Once all of the polenta is added, turn the flame to low and simmer, stirring frequently, until the polenta has thickened.  Depending on the coarseness of your meal, it may take 10-40 minutes.  Mine took about 10-12 minutes to cook.  Once thickened, add sugar and vanilla bean or vanilla extract.  Sprinkle cinnamon in if you life.

Place polenta in small bowls and top with milk and a sprinkle of additional brown sugar if you like.

Place leftover polenta in a lined loaf pan for fried polenta sticks as directed in the note above.