Joy the Baker

A good while back I found myself half way through a bottle of wine on a Saturday night, sitting alone on my patio watching cute cat videos on YouTube.

Wait… should I be embarrassed about revealing this to you?  Just wait… it gets better.

I was feeling pretty content with my Saturday night of wine and kittens, except, I didn’t really want to be alone.  Sometime after my last glass of wine, and before I started eating frozen yogurt straight from the container, I found myself filling out one of those online dating service profiles.  Yea… I was totally having that moment in my life.

Because there’s no shame in my game, I won’t even hesitate in telling you that filling out one of those profiles is a complex mixture of fun, excitement and nausea.  So many questions to answer.  So many clever quips to whip up.  So many ways to try and say that I’m weird and cool, and I spend a lot of time in my kitchen, and I kinda have a thing for kitten videos and wine and frozen yogurt…. without saying anything about kittens and wine and frozen yogurt.  That, after all, might come across as too weird.

What I really wanted to say was something like.. “Hey!  You’re cool.  I’m cool.  Let’s get to know each other.  I’ll make us pizza.  I’ll make us salad, but I won’t be mad if you don’t really want to eat it.  Cookies.  I can make those too.  Also… I like Star Wars, except I might call ‘Storm Troopers’ ‘Star Troopers’ on accident.  And… your Mom is going to love me, and I’m going to think she’s pretty rad too.  Let’s do this!”

It all worked out.  I think I may have had that profile up for about a month before I realized it wasn’t really my scene.  I have someone pretty awesome to make pizza for now.  He knows all about the wine and kitten videos and frozen yogurt.  He likes all those things too… plus Star Wars.  That feels pretty nice.

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I used to keep a dream dictionary by my bed.  Fact.  I thought that I could wake up from a vivid dream all about pansies and weasels, broken clocks and cotton candy to thumb through a book and answer all off those deep subconscious questions.

It never worked.  I was lucky enough if I’d remember the dream, and luckier still if I had the wakefulness to actually reach for a dictionary first thing in the morning.

My dreams are trying to tell me something, I just leave it up to my sly and cunning brains to figure it out or leave it a mystery.

In the same way, my body was trying to send me a message early this morning.  I hadn’t been awake and in the world for more than an hour when I found myself standing at work in the restaurant saying exactly this, completely unsolicited:

I want potato salad.  I want potato salad exactly now.  Potato salad sound SO good.  I want pounds and pounds of potatoes in my belly right this second!

How’s that for a craving!?

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