Ok.  I’ve come to terms with the fact that I have housewife tendencies.  It’s true.  Don’t judge me… that would be rude.

I’ve tried to ignore these urges.  I’ve tried to pass it off as a phase… but really?  This can’t go on.  I’m going to have to own my housewife tendencies.  Now seems like as good a time as ever to fess up. 

See… yesterday afternoon I put on my frilly 1950’s apron, pulled my hair back, put on my giant fake pearl earrings and made homemade dinner rolls.  The apron and pearls are essential, so is a cigarette and a stiff cocktail if I’m to believe what I see on Mad Men.  

So there I am in my kitchen, proudly clad in my housewife gear, hand kneading some pretty sexy roll dough, thinking I’ve got it pretty kush when I realize that my housewife fantasy is missing two things… a… um… er… husband… and mud covered children that I have to chase around the house to get into the bath.  

So.  Ok.  Fine.  My housewife tendencies are really just an excuse for me to play dress up for an afternoon.  And rolls and butter?  Just the awesome perk of my extended dress up games.

Pretty pretty dinner rolls.  This luscious dough comes together with just ten minutes of hand kneading.  They’re buttery and sweet, and have some thickness and weight without being dry and boring.  They’re so lovely.  You’ll feel all sorts of impressed with your abilities.  

This recipe is a classic.  Parker House Rolls are said to have originated in the 1870’s (whaaaat!?) at the Parker House Hotel in Boston.  Old school. 

keepin’ it real.

Parker House Rolls

     recipe from The Gourmet Cookbook

     makes 20 rolls

     Print this Recipe!

3 tablespoons warm water (105 to 115 degrees F) 

3 tablespoons sugar

1 (1/4-ounce) package (2 1/2 teaspoons) active dry yeast

1 stick (8 tablespoons) unsalted butter

1 cup whole milk

2 cups bread flour

1 1/2 teaspoons salt

3/4 – 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

Stir together warm water, 1 tablespoons sugar and yeast in a small bowl until yeast in dissolved.  Let stand until foamy, about five minutes.  If the mixture does not foam up, throw it out and start over with different yeast.  Foam means that the yeast is livin’.  

Melt 3/4 stick (6 tablespoons) butter in a small saucepan.  Add the milk and heat until lukewarm.  Pour into a large bowl and add yeast mixture, remaining 2 tablespoons of sugar, bread flour, and salt.  Stir with a wooden spoon until just combined.  

Stir in 3/4 cup all-purpose flour, dump out onto a clean work surface and begin to bring the dough together into a ball.  If your dough is too sticky to handle, add up to 1/2 cup of all-purpose flour a tablespoon at a time until the dough is just slightly sticky.  

Knead dough until a smooth and elastic dough begins to form, adding more all-purpose flour as needed.  The dough will be smooth, satiny and just slightly sticky after 10 minutes.  Good job!  Form dough into a ball and place in a large, buttered bowl, turning the dough so that the entire ball is covered.  Cover with plastic wrap and a towel and let rest n a warm, draft free place until doubled in size, about 1 hour.  

Butter a 9×13-inch baking pan.  Divide dough into 20 equal pieces.  Roll each one into a ball and arrange evenly in 4 rows of 5 in a baking pan.  Cover loosely with plastic wrap and let rise in a warm, draft free place until almost doubled in size, about 45 minutes.  

Using a floured chopstick or the edge of a ruler, make a deep crease down the center of each row of rolls.  Let rolls rise, loosely covered for 15 minutes.  

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F and place a rack in the center of the oven.  

Melt the remaining 2 tablespoons of butter and cool slightly.  Brush the tops of the rolls with butter and place in the oven for 20-25 minutes, until golden brown.  Cool rolls in the pan for 5 minutes then remove and serve warm.  Reheat rolls wrapped in foil in a 375 degree oven if you’d like to eat them the next day with butter and jam.  Serious yum.

I…

Hate:  diet soda.  Like:  water.  Love:  bourbon.

Hate:  skinny jeans.  Like: Jeggings (jean leggings people… jean leggings).  Love:  my Levis.  

Hate:  bathing suit shopping.  Like:  vintage dress shopping.  Love:  shopping with someone else’s credit card… which never happens… ever.

Hate:  cold soup.  Like:  most soup.  Love:  um…. soup soup soup.  I really like soup.

‘Hate’ is such a strong word.  ’Hate’ was a bad word in the house I grew up in.  Mom, if you’re reading this… yes, you taught me better… but look!  I’m eating my broccoli!  That’s got to count for something. 

This soup is pure and simple.  Green vegetables with a touch of spice and a splash of citrus.  I dolloped my soup with a bit of sour cream because… seriously?  Yum.  

psssst… this soup is super filling too! 

Broccoli and Arugula Soup

     adapted from goop.com

     makes enough for two large servings

     Print this Recipe!

1 tablespoon olive oil

1 clove of garlic, chopped

1/2 yellow onion, chopped

1 head broccoli, cut into large florets, about 2/3 pound

2 1/2 cups water or vegetable stock

1/4 teaspoon of sea salt and black pepper, or season to taste

1 teaspoon ground cumin

1 cup arugula leaves, packed

squeeze of 1/2 lemon

Heat olive oil in a large saucepan over medium heat.  Add the onions and cook until soft and translucent, about 4 to 5 minutes.  Add the garlic cloves and cook for another minute.  Add the broccoli and cook for about 4 minutes, until the broccoli is bright green in color.  Add the cumin, salt and pepper.  Stir to combine. 

Add the water or chicken stock, lower the heat and cover.  Cook for about 8 minutes, until the broccoli has been softened. and is just tender.  

Here’s the tricky part.  We’re going to blend the soup.  Working in batches, transfer some of the soup liquid and broccoli to a blender.  Add half of the arugula leaves and blend until smooth.  Transfer to a bowl or another pot while you blend the second batch of soup with the rest of the arugula.  Return to a pot over a low flame, check to see if it needs more salt or pepper.  Throw in the juice of 1/2 a lemon and serve.  

This soup also freezes well!

Sometimes life feels like layers of complications.  Like taxes and traffic and cavities and getting laid off are all piled high into one smelly sandwich that you’re supposed to eat for lunch.  Really…?  Worst sandwich ever.  Do not want. 

Complicated.  Yea.  It happens to you.  It happens to me.  

Luckily there’s… bread.  And thank the holy heavens for butter.  

Bread and butter.  Yes.  A post about bread and butter.  Perhaps the most beautiful and uncomplicated thing you can put into your face.  Don’t fight me on this one.  That would only make things more complicated.  Go and eat.  Bread and butter. 

And yes… I burnt the bottom of my bread a bit.  These things happen. 

This is a pretty foolproof bread recipe.  Don’t worry.  If you’re intimidated by yeast and bread baking you might consider freeing yourself of that fear with this recipe.  Really… all you need is time… sometimes that’s the hardest ingredient to come by.  Take a lazy weekend afternoon and give this bread a try.  It’s worth the effort just to make your house smell like fresh baked bread.  Trust. 

Two Crusty Round Loaves

     I followed the recipe I found from Jaden of Steamy Kitchen

     Print this Recipe!

4 cups bread flour (the higher gluten content in important)

2 teaspoons active dry yeast

2 teaspoons salt

1 1/2 cups warm water

Measure out 1/4 cup of bread flour and reserve a the clean counter top.  Place the remaining 3 3/4 cup bread flour in the bowl of a stand mixer fit with a paddle attachment.  Measure the salt and place on one side of the flour and add the yeast to the opposite side of the flour.  Pour the warm water in the middle and mix on low speed (with the paddle attachment) until the dough just comes together.  

When the dough forms a mass, switch to the dough hook and mix on medium speed for 2 minutes.  Dough should clear the sides but may stick to the bottom a bit.  If you feel like the dough is too sticky or too dry, feel free to add a touch more water or flour by the tablespoonful.  After 2 minutes, let the dough rest for five minutes.

After the five minute rest, mix the dough again for 3 minutes.   Place the dough on the counter and, using the 1/4 cup of bread flour we reserved in the beginning, hand knead the dough.  You may not need to incorporate the entire 1/4 cup.  If the dough feels firm and solid enough, just knead for a few minutes and prepare it to rest.  You should have a satiny, smooth compact ball.  

Place the dough in a lightly oiled bowl, and turn the dough over to coat the entire dough lightly in oil.  Cover with plastic wrap and a kitchen towel and place in a warm spot to rest for 1 1/2 hours.  The dough should double in size.  Remove from the bowl, punch down and reform into a ball.  Return to the bowl, cover and allow to rest for another 30 minutes.

After the second short rest, place the dough on a lightly floured surface and cut into 2 pieces.  Form each piece into a smooth, round ball, tucking any haggard edges on the underside of the dough.  Leave to rest, covered with a damp cloth, on the lightly floured surface for 45 minutes to a hour.  

During the last 20 minutes of the resting period, preheat the oven to 450 degrees F.  Place a baking rack in the lower third of the oven and leave either a baking stone or an upside down baking sheet in the oven to heat as well.  

Just before the boules are set to go in the oven, slash the top of the loaves with 2 to 4 slashes, using a sharp knife.  This will allow the bread to expand in the oven.  Remove the super hot baking sheet from the oven.  Carefully transfer the dough onto the baking sheets and return to the oven.  

Here’s some fun!  Just after you put the bread in the oven, take 1/4 cup of water, open the oven door, quickly poor the water onto the hot oven floor and immediately close the oven door.  We’re creating steam here people… it’s exciting.  Wait 2 minutes and repeat the process.  

Bake loaves for 20-25 minutes.  They’ll be golden and gorgeous.  Remove from the oven and insert a thermometer.  The temperature should be between 190 to 210 degrees F.  

Here’s the hard part:  let the bread cool completely before slicing.  

You did it!  Now where’s the butter!?

The kitchen.  It’s where I do a majority of my… standing.  

Standing and staring.

Standing and staring and spreading cream cheese onto Wheat Thins.  

Standing and staring and eating cream cheese and Wheat Thins until I come up with a recipe and post idea.  

If you were a fly on my kitchen wall… well, I wouldn’t like that very much… but you would probably think that a) I have very few brain cells firing with all of the standing and staring I do and b) I have an unhealthy relationship with cream cheese.

You might be right about the brain cells…  I won’t argue that the standing and staring is a strange process.  But the cream cheese?  Yea… I’ll admit I have a bit of a problem with cream cheese and crackers.  I’m trying to break the habit with chick peas and olive oil and mint and parsley.  I think it’s working.  I really think it’s working. 

Delicious.  Delicious.  Crazy delicious.   This spread is hummus meets pesto meets lemon meets delicious.  

Ooh… and it’s totally healthy too. Dang! 

This spread  is creamy without the cream, a little tart, a little herby and all sorts of satisfying.  On warm spelt tortillas… it’s my new favorite thing.  For serious. 

Chickpea, Mint, and Parsley Spread

     Martha Stewart Living, May 2007

     Print this Recipe!

1/2 cup olive oil, plus more for drizzling

1 medium onion, coarsely chopped

4 small garlic cloves, coarsely chopped

2 cups chickpeas, rinsed and drained

1/3 cup fresh mint, coarsely chopped

1/4 cup fresh flat-leaf parsley, coarsely chopped

2 tablespoons plus 1 teaspoon fresh lemon juice

1 1/4 teaspoon coarse salt

fresh ground black pepper

warm pitas, bread or crackers

Heat 1/4 cup olive oil in a sauce pan over medium heat.  Add the onions and cook until very soft, about 8 minutes.  Add the garlic and cook for another 2 minutes.  Add the rinsed and drained chickpeas and cook for another 3 minutes.  Remove the mixture from the heat and let cool for 15 minutes.  

Put the chopped mint and parsley into the bowl of a food processor.  Add salt, pepper and lemon.  Add the chickpea mixture.  I have a smaller food processor and did this in two batches, dividing all of the ingredients in half and blending it twice. 

With the machine running, blend all of the ingredients and add the remaining 1/4 cup of olive oil in a slow and steady steam, allowing it to emulsify.  Spread can be refrigerated in an airtight container for up to 3 days, or transferred to a serving dish, drizzled with olive oil and served with warm pita or warm spelt tortillas (pictured).

Here are a list of questions I think might be running through your head right now. Well… I like to flatter myself by thinking that these questions might be running through your head. It’s a self-involved delusion . I know you have better things to worry about. Also included here are the answer to before mentioned self-involved questions.

You might be thinking:

Seriously, Joy? Here we are in prime baking mode and you bring us crackers!? Crackers!?
Answer: Yes. Crackers. Big, thick and crispy, salty and satisfying crackers. They have sea salt, people… they must be fancy.

Joy, what are you wearing to your holiday party tonight?
Answer: I. Don’t. Know. Please send help. Please send a new outfit. Please get these crackers out of my face so I stop stress eating them.  Please.

Joy, calm down. Why not just wear your nice pair of jeans?
Answer: What? I can do that? I can seriously do that? I’ll can wear my nice pair of jeans even though they’re still jeans?  I suspect you’re just trying to make me feel better. I have to find a skirt and top combination that doesn’t make me look like too much of a lunatic hippie.  Drats.

These crackers aren’t helping. Someone take these crackers away from me.
And send help… send a pretty black top with sparkles. Quickly.  Thank you.

Let’s talk about these crackers, shall we?  With poppy seeds and sea salt, these crackers are more like crunchy biscuits… like dog treats for people… like you’ll find yourself reaching for cracker after cracker, and that’s no joke.  

The most lovely part about these crackers is that they come together in just about 10 minutes and bake up in 30 minutes.  Try them.  You might find your happy place.

Sea Salt and Poppy Seed Crackers

      from The Complete Book of Cookies

     makes 20 crackers

     Print this Recipe!

1 cup all-purpose flour

1/4  teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon sugar

1 Tablespoon butter, cold and cut into 6 small chunks

1 Tablespoon poppy seeds

6 Tablespoons half and half

For topping the crackers:

sea salt

half and half

Preheat the oven to 300 degrees F.  Sift together the flour, salt and sugar.  Add the butter and, using your fingers, rub the butter into the flour until it is in tiny bits and dispersed throughout the flour mixture.  

Stir in the poppy seeds.  

Add the half and half and mix to make a stiff dough.  Place on a lightly floured surface and roll out to about 8×10-inches.  Cut into 20 squares.  

Place the dough squares on an ungreased baking sheet lined with parchment or foil.  Brush sparingly with half and half and sprinkle with sea salt.  

Bake for 30 minutes or until crisp but still pale.  Transfer to a wire rack to cool and store in an airtight container.

This big old bowl of tomatoes and cream is the best thing to ever come out of my kitchen.

So good.  So right. I’m thinking of retiring.  I’m thinking of hanging up the apron strings and ending on a high note.  You know, like Seinfeld did in the 90’s.

But it’s just tomato soup?  What could be so special about it?  Let me explain. 

Tomatoes.  Top quality canned Italian tomatoes make all the difference in this soup.  I got my hands on two giant cans of whole San Marzano tomatoes and they made this soup absolutely irresistable.  

But they’re just tomatoes.  Yes they’re just tomatoes… just the best canned tomatoes EVER!

San Marzano Tomatoes are a type of plum tomato with a thin skin, fewer seeds and an oh so sweet and less acidic tomato flavor.  They’re like tomato bombs from heaven, except they don’t really explode and they’re  from Naples, Italy where they’re grown at the base of Mount Vesuvius.  For real… this actually happens.  Tomatoes at the base of a volcano.  Amazing.  It’s the volcanic soil that filters out any water impurieties before they reach the plant.  Rad.  Want to make some kickass soup?  Get your paws on these tomatoes, and I mean now!

Creamy Tomato Soup

     adapted from Martha Stewart

     serves 6

     Print this Recipe!

4 Tablespoons (1/2 stick) unsalted butter 

2 Tablespoons olive oil

1 medium onion, chopped

1 medium carrot, finely diced

course sea salt and fresh black pepper

splash of red wine vinegar (just over 1 Tablespoon)

1/4 cup all-purpose flour

3 Tablespoons tomato paste

1 dried bay leaf

2 cans (14 1/2-ounces each) low sodium chicken broth

2 cans (28-ounces each) whole peeled tomatoes in juice  (with basil if available)  

1/2- 3/4 cup whole milk or cream

In a large saucepan or Dutch oven melt butter over medium heat.  Add oil, carrot and onion and season with salt and pepper.  Cook until the onion is translucent and the carrots are well on their way to softening, about 7 to 8 minutes.   Add the splash of vinegar at stir until cooked off.  

Turn flame to low and add flour.  Incorporate into the onion and carrots.  Add tomato paste and cook for 1 minute to distribute the paste and cook off the flour taste.  

Add chicken broth and bay leaf.  

With clean hands add the tomatoes to the pot, breaking the whole tomatoes up with your hands as you add the tomatoes and the juice.   Bring to a boil and reduce heat to a simmer for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally.  

Remove from heat.  Using an emulsion blender, puree soup in pot until you’ve reached the desired consistency.  Maybe you like more chunks than some folks!  If you don’t have an emulsion blender, let the soup cool for about 30 minutes and, working in two or three batches, puree some of the soup in a conventional blender until smooth.  Place pureed soup in a bowl and puree the remainder in the pot.  

Return pureed soup to the pot and stir in milk or cream.  Season with salt and pepper to taste.  

Let cool to room temperature before dividing among airtight containers or jars (leaving 1 inch of space at the top) and freeze.

Can I tell you a secret?  Sometimes I lack all confidence in the kitchen.  It’s true.  Sometimes a project will keep me up at night.  Sometimes the ingredient list will just baffle me.  Sometimes I hold my breath as I incorporate the ingredients, or I second guess myself and reread the recipe with every turn of my spatula.

It’s the absolute truth.  Sometimes I just need someone to hold my hand through a new recipe… or I at least need to be allowed to throw my hands up and call uncle at any point during the process.

I tell you all this so you know that when I stepped in the kitchen to make pasta this past weekend… well… I was totally intimidated.  I wasn’t sure I could pull this off.

I know… I know… everyone was telling me how easy it was.  Frankly, I was convinced they were liar liarpants.  For real.  Handmade pasta!?  Easy?  Not possible.

Well, let me be honest.  Pasta isn’t as entirely easy as everyone would have me believe.  That’s not to say it’s impossibly hard…. not at all.  For me, making pasta by hand just involves a little talking to myself, a big area where I could throw flour all around, a rolling pin and willingness for a good arm work out, and a few hours set aside for doughing… mostly just patting it, talking to it, and walking around the house showing it to whatever family member would pay attention to me.

The end result is beyond… BEYOND comforting.  The process was super satisfying, and really?  So Much Fun!  Pasta!  I made pasta!  Daaang!  I’m going to go ahead and pat myself on the back for this one.  Don’t mind me… I’ll be done in a minute.

Pasta is pretty straight forward.  Flour and eggs, mixed, rolled, cut and boiled.  But.  And there’s always a but.  What kind of flour do you use?  There’s 00 flour.  There’s semolina.  There’s all-purpose flour… and don’t even get me started on the combinations!  I used all-purpose flour because I wanted to experiment with a recipe that you could easily replicate at home.  We’re in this together, right?

There is one thing worth noting…. this one is a big deal.  Pay attention to egg size with this recipe from Mario Batali.  All of the baking recipes that I post call for large egg.  Large eggs are standard baking practice.  This recipe calls for extra-large eggs.  You’ll need that added moisture.  It’s important.

Here’s a snazzy step-by-step followed by the recipe and official instructions.  Yea?  Yea!

Six eggs and a dash of olive oil in a flour well.  Things are about to get good.

Whisk up the eggs and slowly bring in the flour.  Cool.  I’m totally playing with my food!

Coming together.  Getting there!

This might just be a ball of dough!  Almost!  Dang I’m good.  Confidence is growing.

I had a lot of the initial 5 cups of flour left over.  I decided that was ok.  I dumped the excess in the trash.  So there.

The sixth and final cup of flour got sprinkled on the counter and put to  work inside the pasta dough.

But I even had some of the last cup of flour left over!

Excess flour is fine fine fine!  Look how pretty this dough ball is!

After a 30 minute rest it’s time to roll this beast out.  Roll and roll and roll….

and roll and roll… until I just couldn’t roll anymore.  Then it’s time to slice.

Slice and slice and slice and slice.

What do you think?  Your turn?

Want a little YouTube courage?  I watched this video before I started my pasta adventure. It was nice to see a visual.

Homemade and Handmade Pasta

recipe from Mario Batali

serves 6

Print this Recipe!

5 to 6 cups unbleached all-purpose flour or bread flour
6 extra-large eggs
3/4 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil

Make pasta dough:

Put 5 cups flour in a 12-inch-wide mound on a work surface. Make a 6-inch-wide well in center (down to work surface) with fist. (The outer wall should be 1 1/2 to 2 inches high.)

Break eggs into well and add oil. Beat eggs and oil together with a fork, then gradually beat in flour from inner side of well wall, keeping wall intact while mixture is runny, until it comes together in a cohesive, kneadable mass (about two thirds of flour from mound will have been incorporated).

Knead dough with floured hands, incorporating just enough flour on work surface until dough no longer sticks to hands. (It will still be a little tacky; you will have flour left over.)

Set dough aside and scrape up and discard flour from work surface

Lightly reflour work surface using some of remaining cup flour and continue to knead dough, reflouring hands often, until smooth and elastic, about 6 minutes more. (Dough should still be slightly tacky.)

Form dough into a ball, then dust well with flour and wrap in plastic wrap. Let dough rest 30 minutes at room temperature.

Rolling out the Pasta:

Here’s where the arm work out comes in.

Unwrap the dough from the plastic wrap.  If the dough is sticky.. mine was… just dust it with flour.  Cut the dough in half, put half on the big clean counter where you’re going to roll the pasta out, and rewrap the other half so it doesn’t dry out.

Lightly dust your work surface with rice flour or a little bit of all-purpose flour.  Slowly and evenly begin to roll the dough out.  Flip and twist the dough on the counter top to ensure that it isn’t sticking.  If spots are sticking, lift the dough and lightly dust the surface with flour and continue rolling.

How thin do you need to roll the dough?  Thinner than you think, it’ll plump up when cooked.  I rolled mine thin enough so that I could vaguely see a magazine cover when placed under the dough.  It should be thin enough to see something under it.  Yea?

Once rolled out, take a pizza cutter and cut strips in your desired thickness.  I made fettuccine sized noodles, but you can go just thinner for linguine or fatter for pappardelle… or even fatter for lasagna noodles.  Just eyeball it if you have a steady hand.  You can do it!

Once sliced, I loosely piled up the fresh noodles with just a bit of flour so they didn’t stick.  I re-floured and fluffed them every once in a while just to make sure they didn’t stick.  Loosely cover the cut noodles with plastic wrap and begin to roll and cut out the other half of dough.

Don’t want to cook your pasta right away?  Want to store it?  Here’s how!

Cooking your Pasta:

Once all your pasta is rolled and sliced, bring 8 quarts of water to a boil.  Add 2 teaspoons of kosher salt to the boiling water and add half of the cut pasta.  Cook for 1 or 2 minutes until al dente.  Remove cooked pasta from boiling water with tongs, and drop in the other half of cut pasta to cook.  Drain all of the cooked pasta in a colander.  Do not rinse.

Sauce?  How about a big ol’ Bolognese?  Recipe coming soon!

Is it just me, or are there butterflies everywhere?  

Maybe it’s butterfly hatching season…. that’s a technical term: butterfly hatching.  Obviously.  

Exhibit A:  On a particularly rough day at work, a butterfly just about the size of my hand fluttered around me showing off its black, yellow and red wings.  Absolutely gorgeous.  

Exhibit B:  Just this morning a butterfly whizzed past my nose as I rode a bike through the Oakland hills.  High speed butterflying.  

I don’t even need an Exhibit C, I’m tellin’ you… there’s something in the air:  butterflies.  

So, all of this beautiful fluttering action has lead me to, well… look for a little meaning in all of it. 

I know… totally cheese ball, right?  It’s just that I feel something in the air.  Maybe it’s the change of season, or maybe it’s my sun sign doing God knows what to my moon sign.  Who knows?  I just feel a flood of change coming my way.  I think that’s what all these butterflies are trying to tell me.  Change is a’comin’, in more ways than I might already think.  That… or it’s just butterfly hatching season.  I don’t know.

In other news:  I have a fridge full of zucchini and I made zucchini pancakes.  

You probably know me well enough by now to understand my lengthy and well documented affection for pancakes.  

That being said… these pancakes aren’t the sweet breakfast treat that you might expect from me.  Think of them more like a potato pancake… the kind you might top with sour cream or apple sauce.  These are the zucchini version of potato pancakes.  They’re super easy to throw together and all sorts of fun to eat.  I topped mine with a bit of sour cream and sweet paprika.  Dinner, made so easy.  

Zucchini Pancakes

     makes about 18- 20 2-inch pancakes

     adapted from Stephanie Gallagher

     Print this Recipe

• 4 cups shredded zucchini (or a combination of shredded zucchini and shredded yellow squash)
• 1 tsp. kosher salt, divided
• 2 large eggs, lightly beaten
• 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/2 tsp. baking powder
• 1 or 2 cloves garlic, minced
• a few dashes of Tabasco
• 1/4 cup onions, finely diced and grilled
• 2 Tbsp. plus 2 teaspoons extra virgin olive oil

Grill diced onions in 2 teaspoons of olive oil until they are slightly browned and set aside.

Place zucchini and 1/2 tsp. kosher salt in a colander. Drain for ten minutes, pressing down with paper towels to push out all the excess water.  You can also place shredded zucchini in a very clean dish towel to squeeze out excess water after it has sit with the salt for 10 minutes.

Whisk the remaining 1/2 tsp. salt, Tabasco, and eggs together in a large mixing bowl. Add the flour, baking powder, garlic, grilled onions and zucchini. Mix until all the ingredients are well-combined.

Place the olive oil in a large nonstick frying pan and heat over medium-high heat. When the pan is hot, drop the zucchini mixture by rounded tablespoons. Flatten gently with a fork. Cook 2 minutes or until golden brown around the edges. Flip and cook another two minutes. Remove to a plate and cover with foil to keep warm. Serve immediately.

You know that team building exercise you might play at sleep-away camp that requires you to fall backwards into the waiting arms of a fellow camper?  The Trust Fall?  The basic idea is that you completely let yourself fall backwards, trusting that the person behind you has arms outstretched to catch you before you hit the ground.  It’s a very literal way of saying “Hey!  I’ve got your back!”  or “Don’t worry, I’ll catch you if you fall.”  If the person you’ve entrusted to catch you is not paying attention and flirting with her sleep-away boyfriend as you fall… well, you might have trust issues for life.  Not cool.

I bring up the old Trust Fall because we’re talking about sandwiches.  Sandwiches are serious business.  I feel like I need to do a good round of Trust Falling with someone before we’re allowed to make each other sandwiches.  Like I said… sandwiches are serious.

I need to know that someone has got my back when they make me a sandwich.  Who’s making me a sandwich?  No one… that’s not the point.  It’s all about trust, and care and attention.  Like… which slices of bread they choose from the loaf, and how the mayonnaise doesn’t sneak over the edges, and how the tomato slices are just thin enough, and the lettuce is mostly dry from the washing.  Sandwiches have a lot of details.  There’s a lot going on.  I need to trust that my sandwich maker can handle these details… you know?

What?  Too much?  It’s just a sandwich?  Yea… a sandwich.  I take my sandwiches to heart.  I haven’t done the old Trust Fall with the young gentlemen at my local sandwich shop, so frankly, I don’t know if I can trust them to make me a sandwich… ridiculous, but true.

So, yes.  I’m a touch neurotic about my sandwiches.  That’s just how it goes.  Because I’m so ridiculous, I usually make my own.

This time around I made my own mayonnaise, because, holy heck it’s easy!  Mayonnaise is a simple emulsion of egg yolk, flavors like mustard and seasoning, acid, and a fat like canola oil or olive oil.   Olive oil will make a strongly flavored mayonnaise.  I went for a roasted red pepper (I bought a jar) version using grapeseed oil as the fat.  This version creates a slightly looser mayonnaise than the one you might scoop from the store bought jars.  For a plain mayonnaise you can make with a bowl and a whisk, check out this tutorial.  It’s handy.

Roasted Red Pepper Mayonnaise

adapted from Fat

Print this recipe!

makes about 1 cup of mayonnaise

1 large egg yolk

3/4 teaspoon Dijon mustard

1 teaspoon lemon juice

salt and pepper to taste

1 roasted red pepper, coarsely chopped ( I used the jarred variety.  Easy!)

3/4 cup canola or grapeseed oil

Combine egg yolk, mustard, lemon juice, and chopped roasted red pepper  in the bowl of a food processor fitted with the blade attachment.  Mix for about 30 seconds.  Add a pinch of salt and pepper and whirl again.

With the machine running (I know it’s loud), gradually add the oil until the mixture starts to thicken and emulsify.  I added the oil in a steady, but very thin stream.  The mixture will start to emulsify at about the 2 minute mark.  Once it starts to emulsify, you can add the fat more quickly.  If the mixture is too thick for some reason, just blend in 1 teaspoon of boiling water to thin it.  Taste and adjust the seasoning.  Store in an airtight container and refrigerate.  Lasts for 3-4 days.

The Best BLT

makes one sandwich

2 slices of your favorite bread, toasted

3-4 slices of tomato

2 leaves of butter lettuce, rinsed

4 -5 slices of crisp bacon

generous slather of roasted red pepper mayonnaise

Cook up bacon and drain of a paper towel.  Rinse lettuce leaves, and pat dry.  Slice tomato slices and let rest on a paper towel, allowing some of the moisture to be absorbed.

Toast bread and slather with as much roasted red pepper mayonnaise as you like.  Top with bacon, tomatoes and lettuce.  Top with other slice of bread and you’re in business.  Holy yum!

I’m not sure exactly how to say this, so I’m just going to go ahead and put it out there.

For the first time in…. ever… I had fun at a baby shower.   Real time, legitimate good times at a baby shower.  I wasn’t even faking it, not even a little bit.

I’m going to stand by what may be an unpopular position.  In the past I’ve found most baby showers I’ve had to attend, a troubling combination of boring and humiliating.  Between standing around listening to various labor horror stories and playing disgusting baby games that involve Tootsie Rolls and diapers, I typically just barely manage a fake smile.

This weekend’s baby shower was different.  My friends Mitch and Lara got together, got married, and made another human that Lara is currently growing in her belly.  These people are filled with hilarity, and an uncommon and humble goodness.  Watching them open their baby gifts with grace and a downright speedy efficiency (thanks!), I couldn’t help but imagine their little girl filling the onesies, hats and socks they received.  While it may sound silly, the reality of this impending life became more lovely and amazing as each gift was opened.

That I may or may not have been able to cheat at one of the baby team relay games has very little to do with me having a great time at the shower.  Don’t press me on this.  Please.

Now, without a well-crafted transition, I bring you Crustless But Still Dang Good Quiche.

Yes, I think the best part of a slice of quiche is the crust.  Yes, I still made this quiche without crust.  Sometimes crust, with all of its cutting butter and dusting and rolling pins, seem just a little too daunting for my late morning weekend breakfast.  It turns out, if you slather the pie plate with butter, the quiche will bake up beautifully and when sliced, jump out of the dish with no problem.

I used a combination of spinach, mushroom, walnuts and blue cheese in this quiche.  Feel free to play around with any ingredients you might have on hand.  Next time I make this, I’m going to stay away from blue cheese.  The flavor almost took over the whole quiche.  I think a nice cheddar or gruyere would work better.

Crustless Quiche with Spinach, Mushrooms and Walnuts

adapted from The Good Egg

Print this recipe!

1 10-12 ounce bag of spinach, stems trimmed

2 Tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

2 cups chopped mushrooms

1 garlic clove, minced

salt and pepper

3 large eggs

1 cup half and half

1 cup crumbled blue cheese (I would suggest using cheddar or gruyere instead)

3 Tablespoons chopped walnuts or lightly toasted pine nuts

butter for greasing the pie plate

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.  Butter a 9-inch pie dish and set aside.

Place the spinach in a large pot, cover and cook over medium heat just until wilted, about 3 minutes.  Remove from the heat and spoon into a strainer set over  a bowl.  Let cool.

Press hard on the spinach in the strainer with the back of a spoon to remove most of the moisture, then squeeze in your hands to remove more.  Turn out onto a cutting board and coarsely chop  Place between two layers of paper towels or wrap in a clean kitchen towel and press to remove more moisture.  You should have about 1 cup packed spinach.  Set aside.

Heat the oil in a large skillet over medium heat.  Add the mushrooms and cook, stirring until tender, about 5 minutes.  Add the garlic and cook for 1 minutes more.  Add the spinach and cook, stirring, until any remaining moisture has evaporated, about 2 minutes.  Remove from heat.  Add a pinch of salt (the cheese is salty, so you won’t need much) and pepper to taste.

In a large bowl, whisk the eggs until light.  Stir in the half and half.  Spoon the spinach mixture evenly into the buttered pie dish.  Sprinkle with the cheese and nuts.  Pour in the egg mixture.

Bake the quiche until puffed and golden brown, about 35 minutes.  Serve warm or at room temperature, cut into generous wedges.