Joy the Baker

These are pretty, right?  Hot diggity dang, I think they’re precious.  

In the middle of frosting these cupcakes I looked down at my hands.  No big deal.  I was simply looking down at the cupcake in one hand, and frosting covered knife in the other.  I had to see what I was doing, right?  When I looked down at this particular moment, I saw… my grandmother’s hands.  There they were, the worn and wrinkled hands that had absolutely fascinated me as a child… only now spotted with powdered sugar and tinted with food coloring.  

When I was a kid I would hold my grandmother’s hand in my lap and study it like it like I might study my favorite picture book.  Somehow her hands weren’t at all different from reading an intricate a story.  

So there I was, frosting a cupcake with my grandmother’s hands.  The image was so strong that I even put down the cupcake and knife and bent my left index finger with my right hand.  It ached a little.  I don’t know why.  And just like that… those hands were gone from me.  

That was simultaneously perplexing and so comforting.  I had to share that with you…  I now only hope that I live long enough for my hands to be read like a story book.  

Now let’s talk cupcakes!

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I don’t do dishes in the morning.  Dishes are no way to start the day.

While I am all about a big, fat, kitchen wrecking breakfast- morning clean up is absolutely nowhere in my early day itinerary.

The reality is, I may not get to have that perfect, sunny morning weekend wake up experience everday.  I am convinced, however, that there’s a way to put a smile on my face every morning… even if you have to force it on with a wrench.

When I’m in no mood to get out of bed and start my day I give myself this little speech in my head:  Joy,  stop being such a crabby pants.  Get out of bed, go put on that big robe that feels like a combination of cloud and kitten and make yourself breakfast without setting those robe sleeves on fire.  While you’re treating yourself to a fine morning… go ahead and take a break from those breakfast dishes.  You’ve done enough work just getting out of bed… The dishes can wait.

And just like that, the ugly Monday morning isn’t as nasty a beast as I thought.

Make Monday morning Vanilla Brown Sugar Breakfast Polenta, and let the dirty pan soak in the sink until you get home from work.  Live a little… don’t do the dishes.

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What would it feel like if vacations lasted forever?  Would it feel as good as I think it would?  Yes.  Yes, it would.

Reality hits hard after you’ve had days to let your brain ease into a happy mush.

I’m not complaining.  Does it sound like I’m complaining?  Ok… maybe a little.  It’s just hard to let vacation time slip out of my hands.

Maybe permanent vacation is like only eating these cookies for the rest of your days.  Sure, they have both chocolate and vanilla, but you can’t eat cookies forever.  They’d lose their cookie goodness.  Maybe permanent vacation would somehow start to feel like work.  Constant cookies and vacation? I’d be willing to experiment  just to see how the two would treat me after a few years.

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Something happened last night-

It involved me, my space heater, a few comforters, season one of Pushing Daisies, a spoon, and an entire container of chilled rice pudding.

I realized two things last night. One: while Pushing Daisies is beautiful and charming, it’s almost too sweet. It is still, however, an effective way to wish away three hours of a Sunday evening. Two: Yes, my stomach does have the capacity to hold about 8 cups of rice pudding. How awesome is that!?

I ate the whole thing. Fact. Every last creamy, soft, raisin studded, vanilla bite. And the truth? I’d do it all again tonight if I could… and I can… but I won’t. Does that make sense?

This Rice Pudding might be best shared with your family. It’s Super Comfort.  If comfort became a super hero and came to save the day, it would come in the form of this rice pudding.

If you do have to eat the entire thing by yourself, under your covers on a cold night, well…that’s not such a hard cross to bear, is it?

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Black. White.

Chocolate. Vanilla.

Cake. Cookie.

My favorite cookies, ever.

Yes. I can have it all.

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This endeavour was in no way glamorous.  If nothing else, these Homemade Twinkies highlighted my ability to make something from nothing.  I knew I wanted to make Twinkies, which if you aren’t familiar with, are white cake like treats with a light marshmallow-ish cream center.   Amazon sells do-it-yourself-Twinkie-pans, but sometimes I prefer the uphill battle.

So when the need for a Homemade Twinkie strikes, I get out my roll of foil and spice bottle, and I make my own pan.  Well, I’m being generous in calling it a pan.  I essentially made foil boats for cake batter.  I know.  Kinda madness.  I didn’t dream this notion on my own- thank you YouTube.

I’m almost embarrassed to share this with you….  they were so tasty, but the road getting there wasn’t so glamorous.  Sometimes these things happen in my kitchen.

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